Traumas from childhood that affect our lives? I wonder, unknown to each other, if we all don’t have them?
This week I have been involved in deep conversations with members of two different families, and both of their stories seem oddly the same. When I look into my own back yard, I find that I, too, can identify with them. Can you?
In the one example, the young adult woman seems to be locked into a pattern of sadness, unhappiness, and self destruction. There is an underlying anger that seems to follow her all her days. According to her, the problems in her life are always caused by external factors and people. She sees the root of her problems as her mother whom she could “never please.”
The other family involves three adult daughters. A look into their lives demonstrates an older daughter whom the two younger daughters deem as their father’s “favorite.” Of the trio, the younger daughter seems the most affected. Though successful, she retreats within herself, closing herself off to others, constantly striving to be judged as successful through the eyes of her father.
On the opposite end of the spectrum, I think about all the people who have overcome all odds to become successful, healed, loving individuals. Names that come to mind include Abraham Lincoln, Wayne Dyer, Louise Hay… individuals who demonstrate the fact that people “from the other side of the tracks” can become happy, successful people, too.
It is interesting to see that people tend to think they are all alone, that no one has experienced circumstances similar to theirs. However, when one opens up, that’s when one finds that adversity happens to everyone. It is a natural process of life. The flavors of adversity are different, but adversity is there for everyone. The difference lies in what each person chooses to do with the adversity.
What causes one person to rise above their childhood environment and another to stay mired in self pity their entire life? The truth is, life circumstances do not define a person. Each individual is special, whole, complete, and perfect.
Perhaps it starts with choice? Richard Bach says:
“Every person, all the events of your life are there
because you have drawn them there. What you choose
to do with them is up to you.”
Choosing to decide to overcome the obstacles of your life may be the first step, followed by the power of thought. The Foundation for Inner Peace, the Publisher of A Course in Miracles says it this way:
“You may believe that you are responsible for what you do, but not
for what you think. The truth is that you are responsible for
what you think, because it is only at this level that you
can exercise choice. What you do comes from what you think.”
Wayne Dyer’s work, Change Your Thoughts- Change Your Life seems to say it all. Perhaps the path to happiness all starts with a thought and a decision…and a knowing that you are not alone.
